All of us experience pain and suffering during our lives – some much more than others. This is Jessie Parker’s story of often times unbearable pain and what motivates her to continue living.
The 51-year-old Quincy woman has undergone treatment for kidney cancer for eight years. Over that time the disease has spread to her lymph nodes, pancreas, spine and hips.
As overwhelming as that sounds, Jessie feels blessed because, on average, a majority of patients don’t live as long as she has.
“The 5-year survival rate for metastatic kidney cancer is 13%,” she said.
Four years ago, in addition to cancer treatment, Jessie became a patient of Blessing’s Palliative Care team. They help her manage the symptoms of her cancer.
“My pain was uncontrolled,” she said. “Palliative Care has literally saved my life. Dr. Gillette (Kristi Gillette, DO, medical director, Blessing Palliative Care and Hospice) wants me to have the best quality of life that I can have. She and the team are always willing to change my medications, or give me fluids, whatever it is I need to help feel the best that I can through all of this.”
Twists and turns in the fight for her life
Jessie has experienced excruciating flare-ups of her symptoms as the cancer has spread over the past four years.
“I felt like I was at the end of my life,” she says of those medical crises. “I felt like I was dying.”
Each of those times, Jessie says Dr. Gillette talked with her about the option of hospice care. Hospice is for people with a terminal illness and a life expectancy of six months or less, who choose comfort care rather than continuing to try to cure their condition, as they could if receiving palliative care.
Each time, Jessie pulled through the immediate crisis she was experiencing and did not need to make the choice of hospice care.
But Jessie understands and values hospice care. Three family members, including her parents, have been hospice patients. Her father was able to live an additional 16 months, in part, because of the hospice care he received. In her mom’s case, hospice helped her in the final few days of her life.
The Blessing Hospice team provides pain and symptom control to the patient and social and spiritual support to the patient and their loved ones.
“Hospice is such an amazing program. It focuses on quality of life – whether that is 16 months like my dad or just a few days like my mom. Hospice makes all of the time important and matter.”
In her father’s situation, Jessie said having 16 months of time she was not expecting to have with him meant everything to her and to him.
“It meant him getting to see a couple of more grandchildren born. It meant more holidays. It meant more time, and quality time.”
A new end of life care option
Illinois recently passed a law that goes into effect in the fall. It says that after meeting strict guidelines, doctors can prescribe medication to terminally ill patients to end their life. Jessie firmly believes her parents would not have chosen that option. It is not an option Jessie is considering for herself, either.
“I understand not wanting to suffer anymore, because I have been there. But I firmly believe that we are all here on God’s time, and it’s up to him how many days we are on this earth.”
“No one wants to suffer and we certainly don’t want to see our loved ones suffer. Hospice and palliative care are here to help. Let them help you be as comfortable as possible for as long as possible and enjoy your remaining life.”
Dr. Gillette says in her experience, when patients get involved with palliative or hospice care as early as allowable, many feel their suffering is eased. And regarding consideration of all end-of-life care options in Illinois, she added, “This will be a very personalized decision between a patient and their provider.”
In spite of the pain and suffering in her life, Jessie has hope. With advancements in kidney cancer treatment, she says the spread of her cancer has slowed and her condition has stabilized.
“Through the help of Palliative Care and Blessing’s oncologists, I am still here,” Jessie exclaimed.
For more information, go to blessinghealth.org/palliative and blessinghealth.org/hospice.
In the accompanying photos:
Jessie Parker holds a photo of her parents, Ron and Bonnie Milbert
Kristi Gillette, DO, medical director, Palliative Care and Hospice, Blessing Health System